The Tattlesnake National Waterboarding Day and Other Firecrackers Edition

“The size of the lie is a definite factor in causing it to be believed, for the vast masses of the nation are in the depths of their hearts more easily deceived than they are consciously and intentionally bad. The primitive simplicity of their minds renders them a more easy prey to a big lie than a small one, for they themselves often tell little lies but would be ashamed to tell a big one.”
“Through clever and constant application of propaganda, people can be made to see paradise as hell, and also the other way around, to consider the most wretched sort of life as paradise.”
— Benito Mussolini, as quoted by the London Sunday Express, December 8, 1935.

Item 1: Let’s make this Independence Day National Waterboarding Day! Here’s the way it would work: At each major public gathering on Saturday, July 4, 2009, have a crew there ready to waterboard all comers. Bring your conservative friends and relatives who deny that waterboarding is torture and challenge them to personally experience this ‘enhanced interrogation technique’ for themselves. Let them deny it’s torture after they beg for it to stop after 6 or 7 seconds as Mancow Muller did. Just to sweeten the deal, offer a prize of $25.00 for anyone who lasts a full minute. Vets for Peace and other military groups could provide the waterboarders and the equipment is cheap: a few gallons of water, some water bottles, a board that can be slanted and some washcloths. I know this is short notice, but I hope MoveOn.org, True Majority and kindred liberal organizations pick this up and run with it.

Item 2: How did we ever get to the point where sacrificing our health for the profits of a large corporation is an acceptable idea? How did we get to the point where a faceless corporate bureaucrat in a for-profit business denying health care to a sick person is an acceptable idea? How did we go from doctors visiting your home when you were ill to making sick people sit in a waiting room to see the doctor? And, BTW, I’m tired of Congressional Republicans telling us that we have the best health care system in the world. Of course we do if you happen to be a member of Congress. The rest of us have to take our chances. Want to see instant health care reform? Make the Senators and Congress-Creatures go to the Emergency Room when they get sick. After several hours in pain or feeling ill, sitting in an uncomfortable plastic chair waiting for an overworked ER intern to see them, those Republicans and Blue Dog Democrats will be ready to sign on to anything that ends that scene from Dante’s Inferno.

Item 3: How Dumb Can You Get, Part Uno: My old friend tells me he has a Limbaugh-listening neighbor who mimics his Master’s voice on a steady basis. This guy is retired, collecting a union pension, Social Security, and Medicare. Yet he rants and raves against the gub’mint taking his money in taxes and the evil unions. My buddy finally blew up what in hell did he think was paying for his SS and Medicare? TAXES! Where did he think his union pension came from? From a UNION! And, incidentally, Mr. Dumbass, the government administers both SS and Medicare cheaper than any private company could, since they don’t have to turn a profit. My friend’s neighbor won’t be speaking to him for a while, but I’ve also had similar slap-the-forehead conversations with this kind of duped, clueless retiree I can only conclude that listening to RushBo induces a form of brain damage.

Item 4: How Dumb Can You Get, Part Due: I don’t even have to know much about that Free Credit Report.com website to know this it’s a scam. Basic logic: Companies don’t run expensive TV ad campaigns in order to give something away. At the least, they’re mining personal data from those they entrap and reselling it; at worst, they’re somehow charging their customers, giving the lie to the whole ‘Free’ concept. Avoid like the plague.

Item 5: By signing today’s anti-tobacco legislation, putting tobacco products under the purview of the FDA for regulation, President Obama has guaranteed that smoking will remain cool for teenagers for a couple of generations. When will adults get it? Telling rebellious teens something relatively benign and ubiquitous like smoking cigarettes is “bad” is the surest way to get teens to try it, as well as the ‘tweeners’ who worship their older brothers and sisters. I just hope Obama and the Dems work as hard on real health care reform.

Item 6: Word is, “24” star Kiefer Sutherland has been drinking heavy over the years to salve his conscience Sutherland is said to be a liberal like dad Donald, and he hates his show fueling the demented fantasies of right-wingers and, worse, being cited in arguments advocating torture, but he can’t give up the big TV money. Jack Bauer, thy name is misery at least for Kiefer.

Contact the author at editor@ltsaloon.org

2009 R.S. Janes. LTSaloon.org.