Tag Archives: Christopublican

The Tattlesnake Is Gore Gay? GOP Barton Smartin’ and the NV Angle Tangle Edition

— Al Gore sexually assault a woman? I don’t buy it, but this is the tale some Oregon masseuse was trying to sell to the National Enquirer for a cool million, according to Col. Howie Kurtz at the WaHoPo. As a mantra of fact, my friend who has very advanced ‘gaydar’ she called out Ted Haggard months before it was revealed he was regularly visiting a male prostitute and snorting meth has long thought Al was a closeted gay man, something like Kevin Spacey’s character Jim Williams in “Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil.” She thinks the marital break-up of the Gores probably has more to do with Tipper catching Al with a man than a woman. (And leave us not forget that weird groping public kiss at the Dem Convention in 2000. Awkward? You bet.) Ah, Tipper apparently playing the beard to the last.

— If it were any organization other than the current Dem Party collection of timid halfwits, I’d say Texas Oil Republican Rep. Joe Barton just sunk the GOP in the 2010 elections, but then we’ve seen how often these Washington Jackasses have snatched defeat from the jaws of victory, so let’s not get our hopes up.

In case you’ve been meditating in a cave for the past week (and who could blame you?), here’s what Barton publicly said to BP CEO Tony Hayward during a Congressional hearing:

“I’m ashamed of what happened in the White House yesterday,” said Rep. Joe Barton (R-Tex.) during a hearing on Thursday morning with BP’s CEO Tony Hayward.” I think it is a tragedy in the first proportion that a private corporation can be subjected to what I would characterize as a shakedown — in this case a $20 billion shakedown — with the attorney general of the United States, who is legitimately conducting a criminal investigation and has every right to do so to protect the American people, participating in what amounts to a $20 billion slush fund that’s unprecedented in our nation’s history, which has no legal standing, which I think sets a terrible precedent for our nation’s future.

“I’m only speaking for myself. I’m not speaking for anyone else, but I apologize,” Barton added. “I do not want to live in a county where anytime a citizen or a corporation does something that is legitimately wrong, [it is] subject to some sort of political pressure that, again, in my words, amounts to a shakedown.”
— Sam Stein at Huffington Post, as quoted by Ben Dimiero at Media Matters.

BP and Tony Hayward are less popular than O.J. Simpson and here’s Strokin’ Joe embarrassing himself and his party by apologizing to them. Imagine if the tables were turned and some bubblehead Dem said this the GOP would have it on a tape loop with wall-to-wall negative ads running all over the country and every Republican who popped up on a news show would find a way to mention it ten times. True, the Dems do have an ad up, but they haven’t gone all in yet on linking Barton with the Republicans and particularly pointing out the fact that Joe has yet to be relieved of his position as ranking minority member of the House Committee on Energy and Commerce. After initially renouncing Barton’s goofy apologia, some Republicans are now actually coming to his defense! Gee, that wouldn’t make a bad basis for an ad, either, especially in the Gulf States. But, then, the ‘bipartisan’ Democrats apparently find chasing their tails more attractive than hunting the predator that’s trying to kill them.

— The Angle of Attack on Sharron: You’d think someone who wants to dump Social Security and Medicare (but thus far not in favor of bartering for medical care with chickens, thank God), eliminate the IRS without any plan to replace it (how do we pay off the deficit without collecting taxes, Sharron?), still wants to ‘drill, baby, drill’ even after the BP Gulf disaster, and has ‘shifting’ positions on the prohibition of alcohol and fluoridation of water (among other wacky notions), would be pretty easy to beat in a statewide election. Well, she probably will be as even doddering old bumbler Sen. Harry Reid has finally seen fit to call her “crazy” and run a TV ad showing what a hallucinatory teabag of unfounded WorldNetDaily opinions is his Republican opponent. Reid’s no FDR, but he’s George Burns compared to Sharron Angle’s crazy-crap Christopublican Gracie Allen. Sure, the GOP rinse-and-spin machine is busy trying to make her ready for prime time, but this woman’s a political Lady Gaga at the ballpark who can barely hold her own in Fox-friendly interviews and irritatingly insists on calling any legitimate query regarding what she would actually do as senator a “Gotcha” question. In open debate with Reid, she’d be Sarah Palin without the wink; Dan Quayle without the hairdo; Ronald Reagan without the acting experience. But, since Reid’s a twenty-first century milquetoast Democrat, the election will be closer than it should. Still, I think he’ll pull it out.

2010 RS Janes. LTSaloon.org.

Ensign Resign? Keep Dreaming!

Cartoon Ensign's Hypocrisy

“Last year I had an affair. I violated the vows of my marriage. It is the worst thing I have ever done in my life. If there was ever anything in my life that I could take back, this would be it.”
— Sen. John Ensign (R-NV) on June 16, 2009, as quoted by the AP. “Sen Ensign Admits Affair with Ex-Campaign Staffer

“Our families were close That closeness put me into situations which led to my inappropriate behavior. We caused deep pain to both families and for that I am sorry.”
— Sen. John Ensign (R-NV) on June 16, 2009, as quoted by the AP.
Ex-Campaign Aide to Sen. Ensign Confirms Affair

“A born-again Christian, Ensign has been a member of the Promise Keepers, a male evangelical group that promotes marital fidelity.”
— Manu Raju, et al, “Admission clouds Nevada Sen. John Ensign’s future,” Politico.com, June 16, 2009.

“There’s too many people that paint with a broad brush that we’re all corrupt, we’re all amoralAnd having these kinds of things happen, whether it’s a Republican or Democratic senator we certainly have had plenty of Democratic scandals in the past we need people who are in office who will hold themselves to a little higher standard.”
— Sen. John Ensign, as quoted by CNN’s Political Ticker, Oct. 18, 2007.

“This is a personal situation and I hope he gets it resolved.”
— Sen Lindsey Graham (R-SC) on Ensign’s affair, as quoted at Politico.com. [Graham wasn’t quite as generous to Bill Clinton.]

“Im pulling for him.”
— Sen. Harry Reid (D-Idiot) on Ensign’s adultery, forgetting what team he’s supposed to be playing on, as quoted at Politico.com.

Read more

The Tattlesnake The True Meaning of Powell’s Obama Endorsement Edition

On Meet the Press October 19th, Colin Powell took out a very thin, very sharp stiletto and carved up John McCain without ever raising his voice or uttering an angry or blatantly demeaning word, culminating with his endorsement of Barack Obama for president.

Powell has been on a crusade to resurrect his lost integrity and honor since he submitted a noxious pack of lies to the United Nations Security Council in support of Bush’s invasion of Iraq. He knows his performance was the clincher that ended the debate for many Americans if the reasonable and straightforward Powell was behind it, it must be true.

This is the final stage of Powell’s reclamation of his character and veracity rejecting the aggression and insanity of McCain’s more-war stance in favor of the kind of diplomacy he advocated before he served the interests of BushCo at the UN in 2003.

While his endorsement is unlikely to move many civilian voters, former Joint Chiefs of Staff head Powell is still respected in the military and his nod to Obama will signal to many in the armed forces, including the top brass, that it’s safe to support the Democrat this election.

Beyond that, it’s also a sign of the deep fissure in the Republican Party between the Old Guard secular conservatives, such as Powell’s former boss George H.W. Bush, James Baker and Brent Scowcroft, and the emergent power of the Christopublicans, embodied by the elevation of the inexperienced but devout Sarah Palin to vice presidential nominee.

The Old Guard, of course, were happy to use the Christopublicans to get elected, as Reagan and Bush the Elder did, but, once in office, they were put in the corner and ignored.

After Junior Bush’s installment in 2000, the Christopublicans became a much stronger force in the GOP, often calling the shots in various campaigns, although the party wasn’t willing to commit suicide by attempting to legislate such things as abortion and prayer in schools on a national basis. The Old Guard were watching closely at the blowback from the GOP’s interference in the Terri Schiavo fiasco, and the massive public rejection of such meddling it was the ultimate proof that the Christopublicans were destroying the secular conservative Republican Party of small government, deregulation and low taxes in pursuit of their mad idea of a Christian theocracy.

Powell, who rightfully credits his advancement to Bush 41, cooperated with Junior out of loyalty to the family and, out of the same loyalty, might have kept his endorsement to himself this year but, it seems plain, he was given the green light by the Old Guard, including Bush the Elder, to support Obama over McCain.

The doddering McCain himself is a marginalized figure here; the real focus is Sarah Palin, the pious End Times cipher forced upon McCain by the Christopublicans in return for their support. With an illness-prone and elderly President McCain not likely to finish out his first term, the prospect of a Rapture-Ready Palin presidency makes the Jim Dobson’s and Pat Robertson’s giddy in anticipation and causes old Cold War warriors such as Powell, who spent his military career trying to keep the nuclear fuse from being lit, shivers up the spine.

Already we have seen Old Guard Reaganauts from George F. Will to Peggy Noonan and Ken Adelman abandon the GOP for Obama; setting the stage to blame Palin and the Christopublicans for what is shaping up to be a Democratic landslide in November.

They will willingly endure four or eight years of an Obama administration in order to drive the Christopublican menace back to the fringe of the party and assert the power of the Old Guard once more.

Make no mistake, Powell’s strong endorsement of Obama shows that the secular conservatives are ready to step in and retake the GOP from the forces of Christian theocracy bent on touching off a nuclear Armageddon to fulfill their fanatical fantasies.