Tag Archives: St. Patrick’s Day

The Tattlesnake — Erin Go Braless Edition

Some ‘Green Day’ factoids and toasts in honor of me late grandmother who, like Guinness stout, Harp lager, and G.B. Shaw, was a great Irish export.

Happy St. Paddy’s Day!

Five Factoids About St. Patrick’s Day

1. St. Patrick’s real name was Patricius, and historians believe he was born in either Wales or Scotland.

2. The original color associated with St. Paddy’s day was blue instead of green.

3. St. Patrick’s Day was alcohol-free holiday in Ireland until the mid-1970s.

4. The shamrock was intended by St. Patrick to signify the Holy Trinity, not the luck of the Irish. He also created the Celtic cross, which is a combination of pagan and Christian symbols.

5. A pint of Guinness Stout, a staple of Irish drinkers on St. Paddy’s Day, has fewer calories than a pint of low-fat milk or orange juice.

A Random Sampling of Irish Toasts (for anyone who’s toasted to use):

Here’s to health,
fitness and tone
I’ve drank to health
So many times
I’ve managed to
ruin my own.

May we get what we want,
May we get what we need,
But may we never get what we deserve.

In all this world, I do think
There are five good reasons why we drink:
Good friends,
Good luck,
Good times,
And lest we be dry,
And any other reason why.

May the winds of fortune caress you,
May you sail a gentle sea.
May it always be the other guy
who says, “this drink’s on me.”

Here’s to cheating, lying, stealing, fighting, and drinking:
If you cheat, may you cheat death;
If you lie, may you lie on a loved one’s breast;
If you steal, may you steal another’s heart;
If you fight, may you fight for what’s right, brother;
And if you drink, may you always drink
With friends and none other.

Though you may be a scoundrel
And a sinner times seven
May you get lost on your way to hell
And end up in heaven.

BTW, think corned beef and cabbage is a traditional Irish dish? Cabbage, yes, but corned beef is English. Read below.

Read more

St. Paddy’s Day Quote and a Joke

“Think about this: if you rearrange the letters of SAINT PATRICK’S DAY it spells out SATANIC KIDS PARTY!”
— Phils Phunny Phacts

Savin’ o’ the Green

An Irishman worked hard all his life, saved all his money, and was a real miser.

Just before he passed he said to his wife, “When I die, I want you to take all me money and put it into the casket cause Im takin it with me to the afterlife.” He got his wife to promise with all of her heart and upon a stack of bibles that when he died she would indeed put all of his savings into the ground with him.

Well, he finally gave up the ghost and when he was stretched out in the casket his darlin wife was there in black with her best friend beside her. When the ceremony was over and as the undertaker got ready to close the casket, the wife spoke up. “Wait just a moment!”

She walked over to the casket and laid a small metal box inside. The undertaker locked the casket down and rolled it away. Her friend said, “I know you werent fool enough to put all that money in there with your husband,” and the loyal wife replied, “I am an Irish Catholic and Ill not go back on my word. I promised my husband that I was going to put all of his money in the casket wit him, and so I did.

“What? You put all that money into the casket!?”

“Of course I did.” said the wife. “I transferred it into my account and wrote him a check. If he can cash it, he can spend it.”

Thanks to Phil Proctor, Planet Proctor.com