Tag Archives: Stephen Colbert
As Stephen Colbert remarked during a speech at the 2006 White House Correspondents Dinner at which a visibly uncomfortable ‘President’ Junior Bush was on the dais, “Reality has a well-known liberal bias.”
To counter that perceived ‘bias’ at Wikipedia, Eagle Forum nutcase Phyllis Schafly’s kid, Andrew, mounted a dimwitted Christopublican-Free Market-Literal Bible site in 2006 to spread the neoconservative message with bile-laced faith-based delusion, the same delusion that’s damn near destroyed the country, and may succeed in tearing it apart yet. But, hilariously enough, even the Bible as it’s written is not conservative enough for raggedy Andy he actually launched a ‘Conservative Bible Project’ to rewrite those portions he considers too ‘liberal.’ (One would guess that would be any passage expressing kindness for the homeless and poor, berating the rich and telling them to give their possessions away, or asking the reader to forgive one’s enemies and renounce the judging of others.)
Here, Bob Carroll of the Skeptic’s Dictionary drags the little Liar-For-Jesus and his buncombe-packed ‘encyclopedia’ over the glowing hot coals of rationality:
By Bob Carroll
The Skeptic’s Dictionary Newsletter (Skepdic)
Vol. 9 No. 9
September 3, 2010
The group of Christian conservatives (led by Andrew Schafly) who run Conservapedia call their confabulations and rewriting of history, biology, and everything else under the sun, an alternative to “liberal” Wikipedia. Worse, they call their own set of fairy tales “the trustworthy encyclopedia.” They swear to it on a stack of Bibles so it must be true. Their delusions are matched only by the paranormal evangelicals at Skeptical Investigations.
The Conservapedia folks have an entry for “Skepdic,” where they chide me for not listing global warming and evolution as “junk science.” To these puerile jabberwocks, vorpal swords in hand, theology is the queen of the sciences. Under the “contents” heading for their Skepdic entry, they note: “The website also contains articles attacking Biblical history such as Noah’s Ark.” The story of Noah is literal history to these choir boys.
I’m referred to as a “militant” atheist, whatever that is. If you click on “atheist” you find these neo-con confabulators writing: “Unlike Christianity, which is supported by a large body of sound evidence, atheism has no proof and evidence supporting its ideology.” A man could crack a few ribs with falling-down laughter at the claims these clowns make. By proof and evidence I suppose they mean faith. They get very nasty–nasty as only an idiotologist can get. The nicest thing they say about atheism is that it is an ideology. It isn’t an ideology, by any definition, but correct usage of terms is as irrelevant as getting the facts straight to these theocrats. The rest of their diatribe against atheism qualifies them for the Phil Plait certifiable-dick-of-the-year-award.
Dumbest Website Ever
It would be impossible to identify the dumbest website ever, but in addition to Conservapedia I would put Saberpoint in the top ten. Saberpoint’s motto is “riding roughshod over the asinine and idiotic” while “supporting the conservative cause and the tea party movement.”
2010 Bob Carroll.
While I’m not necessarily an atheist deeply cynical agnostic is more like it — and tend to agree with J.B.S. Haldane’s quote: “Now, my suspicion is that the universe is not only queerer than we suppose, but queerer than we can suppose. I suspect that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamed of, in any philosophy,” I admire Bob Carroll and his Skeptic’s Dictionary for attempting to bring some needed rational and scientific enlightenment to a country that’s drowning in revisionist history, goofball religious gullibility, and pure idiotic tripe.
43 Becomes Motivational Speaker
–Politico Staff, Oct. 27, 2009.
Here’s Stephen Colbert’s take on Bush’s first ‘inspirational’ speech:
Colbert Mocks Bush
Hear Limbaugh’s ‘color-blind’ rant here.
“First: Color-blindness is an impossibility. Socialization, history and the institutional facts on the ground make being honestly color-blind quixotic. But, second: Were it possible, it would be a disability, just like, well, red-green color-blindness.” 
“Simply put: It is impossible to be color-blind in a racist society. And anyone with pretenses to the contrary is not only lying to themselves and everyone else by extension, but is also perpetuating racism.”
— Frederic Christie, “Racial Color-Blindness: As Bad as Regular Blindness,” Associated Content, Nov. 18, 2008.
Limbaugh’s “Color-Blind” History of Racially-Charged Comments
— Media Matters, Oct. 13, 2009.
Plus a Ray of Light on McCain’s Silly Phillie Charge and Other Diversions
“If your actions speak louder than words, you’re not yelling loud enough.”
— Stephen Colbert, October 20, 2008.
What’s up with God’s Own Hockey Mom, that plain small-town Wasilla girl we’ve all grown to know and love, dropping $150,000 bucks of RNC cash on clothes and jewelry from such snooty elitist shops as Saks Fifth Avenue and Neiman-Marcus? Say it ain’t so, Joe has Alaska’s neo-secessionist pitbull become a pampered poodle, corrupted by her trip to the lower 48? (Perhaps it was associating with all those liberal socialists on Saturday Night Live is what did it, the same way as Obama meeting Bill Ayers turned him into a 1960s domestic terrorist by osmosis.) Jeepers, next we’ll find out she doesn’t know what the Vice President’s job is, according to the Constitution.
Speaking of Mrs. Bent Mooseburger, why isn’t the following a bigger story among the Big Media bobbleheadery? McCain’s Bullwinkle-Killer spent Alaska taxpayer money to drag the whole fam-damily along with her to various events, paying out $21,000 for daughters Piper, Willow and Bristol to travel and hotel in luxury at the public’s expense. Worse, she lied when she claimed that the kid’s were invited to these events and, worst of all, altered the expense accounts after the fact. Alaska law is clear: Gov. Palin’s expense account is to be used only for official state business, period. This used to be the kind of Enormous No-No that got state executives and those playing executives on TV fired, yet the BM has hardly peeped about it. C’mon, Beemers, step up to the plate here.
Speaking of stepping up to the plate (in the head), Cap’n McCrash is indulging in yet another head-scratcher by using Obama’s innocuous political hat-tip to both World Series contenders the Philadelphia Phillies and the Tampa Bay Rays — as some kind of example of BHO’s horrible hypocrisy. This is interesting since the Ol’ Straight-Talker himself, appearing on Pittsburgh TV station KDKA last July, recited his usual anecdote about telling his North Vietnamese captors way-back-when that some of the officers in his squadron were the starting offensive line of the Green Bay Packers, but for purposes of political pandering, changed the Packers to the defensive line of the Pittsburgh Steelers, even though the story was in his friggin’ book!
“When I was first interrogated and really had to give some information because of the pressures, physical pressures on me, I named the starting lineup, defensive line of the Pittsburgh Steelers as my squadron mates.”
— John McCain on KDKA-TV, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, July 2008.
“Pressed for more useful information, I gave the names of the Green Bay Packers offensive line, and said they were members of my squadron.”
— John McCain, from his book “Faith of My Fathers” (1999).
“Imagine if Al Gore or John Kerry had changed the facts of a story they told forever in order to appeal to whatever swing state they were speaking in? Also, the famous Steelers defensive line that McCain was trying to refer to (Mean Joe, L.C. etc.) didn’t become famous until after McCain was out of Vietnam.”
— Chuck Todd and Domenico Montanaro, MSNBC First Read, July 11, 2008.
Keep digging, Johnny!
Today’s Good News: Extra-crazy Minnesota wingnut Michele Bachmann, a Republican dipstick who somehow got herself elected to the US House of Representatives, channeled Joe McCarthy on Tweety’s Hardball show the other day thusly:
“What I would say is that the news media should do a penetrating expose and take a look — I wish they would. I wish the American media would take a great look at the views of people in Congress and find out, are they pro-America, or anti-America? I think people would love to see an expose like that.”
— Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN) on MSNBC’s “Hardball,” Oct. 17, 2008.
The snapback to this sample of snippety loose-lippery has been two-fold: a.) Her Dem opponent, Elwyn Tinklenberg (and his invisible rabbit friend Harvey), has picked up over $800,000 in campaign contributions since her remark and b.) the National Republican Congressional Committee has pulled all ad money from her campaign, effectively ending her reelection bid. You can also bet that GOP Sen. Norm Coleman, falling behind in his race with Al Franken, will be distancing himself from this ding-a-ling at his earliest opportunity; at this point, she’s like a photo of Norm playing a round of men’s room footsie with Senate colleague Larry Craig. (Incidentally, by the Palin-McCain standard of guilt-by-association, doesn’t this mean Coleman’s gay? I mean, they know each other and Norm serves on a board with him, so to speak.) Buh-bye, Michele — here’s your pitchfork, what’s your hurry?
A Cautionary Warning: Rumor is the McCainiacs are hiring ‘urban street types’ read young black men ‘with an attitude’ dressed as ‘gangstas’ dripping gold chains and wearing head scarves or backwards baseball caps to show up at Obama events and do their best to get into the camera frame, especially in the background when BM reporters do their introductory ‘set-ups.’ They allegedly earn extra coin if they can manage to get themselves interviewed as a ‘typical Obama voter.’ Smell the fear of the frightened bull (O’Connor) elephant.