Trump Agrees to Let Kim Jong Un Have Pence as Manservant
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)---As new details emerge from this week's summit in Singapore, the White House has confirmed that Donald J. Trump unilaterally offered to let Kim Jong Un have…
Here Are 5 Founding Fathers Whose Skepticism About Christianity Would Make Them Unelectable Today
To hear the Religious Right tell it, men like George Washington, John Adams, Thomas Jefferson and James Madison were 18th-century versions of Jerry Falwell in powdered wigs and stockings. Nothing…
“News”-flash!
WASHINGTON---Following months of bruising criticism from Democrats and President Trump alike, an inconsolable Jeff Sessions was reportedly trying to commit suicide Thursday by smoking a joint. Want to read more?…
A Second American Civil War?
CHARLOTTESVILLE, USA - AUGUST 11: Neo Nazis, Alt-Right, and White Supremacists encircle and chant at counter protestors at the base of a statue of Thomas Jefferson after marching through the…
8.4 Million New Yorkers Suddenly Realize New York City A Horrible Place To Live
NEW YORK---At 4:32 p.m. Tuesday, every single resident of New York City decided to evacuate the famed metropolis, having realized it was nothing more than a massive, trash-ridden hellhole that…