Inspection- The Pro-Employment Republican Party

Yeah, you read that right. I am about to argue that Republicans are pro-employment. Indeed one could argue they are pro-socialism. So take advantage of the Republican promo-employment plan. I promise you…

You will get a job.
You will get a place to live.
You will be fed.
You will get clothes.

Work it right and you might not even have to work… if you really are one of those lazy good for nothings they rant and rave about so often. Walk into your local liquor store and murder the cashier.  And do what you need to do to stay in solitary.

Jobs exported to China, India, employers treat everyone as disposal snot paper, so you work for the government instead? Screw you. The current plan offered by the up coming crackpot fringe is to fill those jobs with prisoners. So the next time you new a pothole filled, your new local rapist-public works guy can fill your wife’s holes too.

Ah, they even offer a job with fringe benefits!

Of course there’s always the private sector, you know the one exporting jobs to China, India and never, ever to be encouraged to keep them here unless they’re allowed to pay you damn near the same as prisoners, work you under any conditions they see fit… unless of course your five year old is willing to work even more hours and under worse condition,

You see all that prevents those kinds of abuses? Well, those kinds of regs are all intrusive, meddlesome government “in-ter-fear-ance.”

George W. Bush wasn’t kidding when he went to some of the most oppressive, poverty stricken, countries south of the border and declared he was envious. Of course, if you’re rich and powerful you live like Saddam did… or better.

Or you could join the military a kill legally, if they’ll let you. If you come up to snuff so you can legally “snuff.” But if not, remember…

Step 1: Make sure whomever you kill isn’t favored by the Right. That’s like asking for the needle.
Step 2: Murder them.

Follow this advice and…

You will get a job.
You will get a place to live.
You will be fed.
You will get clothes.

And, as a plus…
You may even find “true love”

It’s all legal, well except the murder part. I’m sure Glen Beck can find some way to “rationalize” that. Our forefathers wanted it this way. Don’t believe me? Don’t bother reading the Constitution. Ask the Supreme 5. Scalia, Thomas and Roberts alone will simply say, “Make it so.”


Inspection is a column that has been written by Ken Carman for over 30 years. Inspection is dedicated to looking at odd angles, under all the rocks and into the unseen cracks and crevasses that constitute the issues and philosophical constructs of our day: places few think, or even dare, to venture.

©Copyright 2011
Ken Carman and Cartenual Productions
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