Sun. Oct 2nd, 2022

Justice Department, EPA Announce $15 Billion Settlement In VW Emissions Fraud

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Donald Trump fired the acting Attorney General, Sally Q. Yates, after learning that she had downloaded a copy of the United States Constitution to her computer, Trump told reporters on Monday night.

According to the Trump Administration’s code of ethics, established by Steve Bannon, a counsellor to the President, “possessing, reading, or referring to the United States Constitution” is a violation that is punishable by termination.

Suspecting that Yates was in breach of that rule, Bannon seized Yates’s computer at the Justice Department and discovered that she had secretly downloaded a complete copy of the 1789 document.

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By OEN

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