Well, da meme said it was true, so it must be!
One source of this claim: American Conservative Voice.
The Facebook post was suspicious at first. It showed a whole group of folks who were supposedly members of some highly organized group of American terrorists called ‘Antifa.’ According to American Conservative Voice version of the meme some of these ‘terrorists’ were teachers too!
Since we’re getting all tricky with Jim Crow-y ID voter laws… you know picture ID, driver’s license, birth certificate, DNA sample, first born… yeah, I’m joking about some of that, I figured I COULD get snarky and ask if they had checked their official Antifa card; which would have all the political talking point gravitas of a Mouse Club Card. But I didn’t. I basically asked what proof they had these people were members of any such highly organized group. I’ve heard less silence on an Adirondack lake at 40 below when you’re the only one around for many, many miles.
Well, I suppose ‘just being’ at a protest might be proof enough for people with the critical skills of a sheep, if you combined that by hunting down the elusive genetic material of a still rotting corpse of a faithful member of the People’s Temple, then top it off with the cringing manners of an obedient puppy. Despite being constantly beaten by an insane sadistic master. Did I mention maybe a worm too? No? OK, that too.
Otherwise they seem to have no proof at all. Just label protesters “Antifa.”
Having been given no real proof each these people are members of some highly organized terrorist cell called Antifa I did what some in-ter-net-ers mistakenly call “research.” I knew the people pictured weren’t Boogaloos or Prouds, or the various Turner Diaries, types. Wrong species of terrorist.
Oh, dang it, and that would have made identifying them as terrorists super convenient!
But, no, to prove them all terrorists I had to do what whomever made the dang thing did: guilt by accusation. OH, and making up s%!t because, no, the FBI did NOT declare these teachers Antifa terrorists.
But I figured good enough for them? Good enough for moi’!
So here is what my massive in-ter-net ‘research’ discovered, backed up by all the solid proof of such used by purr-(Oi!)vey-ers such as Rush Limbaugh, like when he says, “Ya know what Dem-o-rats REALLY want?” I’m always convinced by such politically convenient conclusions, aren’t you? NO?
Convinced now? No? Well, dang.
῾This type of ‘research’ is very tiring. Do you know how HARD it is to shove my tongue so far into my cheek that I almost went to the emergency room?
Oh, wait, all taken up by victims of the Trump virus. The morgue too.
WAKE UP! I KNOW some of you are fake dead, trying to create more ‘fake news.’ Maybe Pat Robertson can roll back the rock and raise you from your ‘sleep?’ I hear he has the Jesus ear in his corner. By the way, why aren’t we hearing about all those faith healers in hospitals using the power of the Holy Spirit, minus masks, healing the dead, driving out demon COVID?
Herman Cain, do you know? Paging Herman Cain. Paging Herman Cain. I think he’s permanently left the building. A sad, unfortunate, karma-based comment amongst many tongue in cheek ones.
But let’s cheer up after that morose moment. Success! Using my new, ‘improved,’ method I found “Antifa” headquarters! And I could tell I was in the presence of the true evil despite the banality of their headquarters and the seeming kindly grandpa image of their founder.
Diz Knee and his child. Jeff Epstein arranged a liaison with a very young Minnie. First inter-species cult leader.
Been there a long time. Started by some very old hippie called, “Diz Knee.” You might notice in the picture at the bottom of this column how it’s disguised as some kid friendly palace. I’ll bet ole Jeffrey Epstein brought his libtard-only clients here! (Shut up, Donnie. Stop implicating yourself.) Their spokesdog is deceptively Goofie. That’s how he avoids answering biting questions. Their other spokes thing wears no pants and has the same first name as Dear Leader. They send that Donald out when the object is to look straight at the question tossed out by the FAILED media and firmly, very strongly, decisively… DUCK.
The head of the terrorist group is a mouse. As we well know from the documentary: Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Universe, mice are pan dimensional beings who are attempting to control EVERYTHING. They even had a propaganda film targeting potential cell members called Tomorrowland showing what an Antifa wonderland might look like. Sections of the massive complex portray the future under their iron fisted, cartoonish-ly evil iron, fisted grip. And Antifa members go around accosting little kids. They wear costumes to hide their true demon-like nature.
Perhaps Eric Prince’s contractors might get Homeland to have them take a break from terrorizing cities run by Dem-o-rats for Trump’s political gain. Send them to this nest of terrorists to ramp up violence as an excuse to… uh, ‘pacify.’ For ultimate proof all I have to do is give Dear Leader’s most certifiably true claim. Undeniable evidence! Just declare, “A lot of people are saying.” CASE CLOSED!
Now let me get back to helping my new found friends who are squashing free speech… uh, terrorism… and demanding all public schools open up. Private schools can do whatever the hell they want, and you REALLY don’t want to get in the way of the glorious DeVos plan to significantly supplement her income by kacking public schools, do ya?
Neveryoumind while schools are forced open the election should be put off. Pay no attention to the contradiction behind the all too thin talking point curtain. It will all work out. After all Master Donnie has been so very, very, very, impressively, EXTREMELY successful at everything he’s done. Aren’t you SOOOOOOOOOOOOO tired of “all the winning?” Such a great legacy leading back through way before he was president: Trump Casino! Trump U! Trump Steaks! Trump Vodka! And the newest one I’m fronting: Trump Anal Plugs designed to stop diarrhea caused by consuming too many lies, too many Trump-isms. Also useful; after initial use, for plugging up his mouth whenever he speaks! OK, made that last one up, but I’m sure if we could get him to use them there would be a very lucrative market. One might even say there would be a… runs… on the market.
He’d need a new one every second.
I know you’ll be a true American and rally to Der Leader’s urge to purge these terrorists! After all: ‘Antifa’ stands for “anti-fascist.” Horrors! Can’t have that!
And Ziggy Heil to you too.
Inspection is a column that has been written by Ken Carman for over 40 years. Inspection is dedicated to looking at odd angles, under all the rocks, and into the unseen cracks and crevasses, that constitute the issues and philosophical constructs of our day: places few think, or even dare, to venture.
Ken Carman and Cartenual Productions
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