Thu. Jul 18th, 2024

Written by Millie Jenny C.

She woke up suddenly. What had startled her awake? She had no idea, but there she was awake. She looked at the clock. It was a good forty-five minutes earlier than when the alarm would normally ring. She thought, if I go back to sleep, I will feel worse. . . She stumbled to get her coffee made, shower taken and face on for the upcoming day. Off she went.

On the way to work in her powder blue Mazda 323, well beyond its days she thought, I just know that Professor is going to have a gigantic mess as usual. She fumed as she flew on through the first yellow light quickly changing to red. Glancing behind her she watched for blue lights. Good, no officer of the law this time, she had forgotten to look. Thats all she needed on a Monday morning.

She was still unsure if having 2 wheels in the intersection would be good enough to avoid a ticket. Now as she blew through the second intersection, she cursed. She did not see the white car that was now following her with the siren & blue lights flashing. Now she was mad at herself. Had she wished the ticket on herself? She pulled off on the shoulder, pulled out her license & registration. She showed them to the officer, Did you realize you went through . . . Yes, yes . . . Im in a hurry. Yes, I am aware I need to pay more attention, slow down. . . I can hurt myself & others. I will slow down. Nancy Piper sat there and waited and waited. It seemed like an eternity.

The officer finally came back to her car. Here is your ticket, Miss Piper and have a nice day and next time just slow down!

A half hour later she calmly pulled back into the backed up morning traffic, cursing again but holding to the speed limit, stopping at all the rest of the lights. Nancy even stopped at the light that was about to change, almost getting run over by the red Camaro. Where was that cop when the driver barely missed her, flipping her the bird with horn Blasting!

She pulled up in front of her bosss office. Yes, yes. . . now I am more than a little irritated. Anticipating the mess, the traffic ticket, road rage etc. The Professor will be upset. He makes the worst messes and if I am a couple of minutes late, well you can guess. She did not want to hear the screeches & shrill calls and all that! It was just so undignified. It seems the messes are even worse on Mondays especially when she is in a bad mood. Since mornings are not her favorite part of the day, this pattern is often repeated over & over. She braced for the encounter as she slowly finished her drive to the office.

Nancy asked herself, How long have I been the housekeeper for this college office? She wished she could have her office be a residence as well. Professor Taylor liked his classes as close to his Then she could sleep to the last possible second and then be there at work, just walking across campus. Well that depends on how you look at it.

Nancy Piper was the housekeeper for that colorful and showy Ms. Polly Witherspoon first. She had been respectful. Despite all of her fluff and feather flying ways she had some dignity. She was not nattering about this and that while she was cleaning. She was quiet and quite respectful. Sure she had her days when she would go on and on and Nancy would have to try & silence her.

She walked in felt violated again. Not only was the Professor screeching at the top of his lungs, the mess was incredible and the stench almost made her wretch. Yet she proceeded to get on the gloves and start to clean. Now you would think the Professor could clean up after himself or at least keep the newspapers tidy. No they were scratched up and stained. It looked like professor had slept in them. It looked like he had tumbled about like he was drunk and make as much of a mess as possible.

She cleaned up as quickly as possible. Straightening, throwing out soiled newspapers, complaining as she went. She even started complaining. She did not realize she was complaining out loud until she heard repeated back to her, You are a bad, bad bird. Bad Ralphie. Bad Ralphie. Why cant you be a nice bird? Why?

And to make matters worse, he screeched at her, Ralphie wants a treat. Ralphie wants a treat. Treat, my ass, Nancy said. Ralphie screamed at the top of his lungs, My ass.. . my ass. Now she had done it. He would probably repeat that at the next board meeting.

As calmly as she could, Nancy walked over to the Professor Ralphies cage and opened the door. Out flew the parakeet. She shooed him out the window saying, And dont come back. She had done this about 5 times previously. Not every week so the college would suspect. Yet each week when she returned there was Professor Ralphie, sitting on his perch waiting to terrorize her again. She could only hope that the next time she released him, he would not return.
Copyright 2009
Millie Jenny C.
all rights reserved


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