Ye Olde Scribe Presents: Interesting, But Rejected, Campaign Jokes, Songs and Slogans

And now, Ye Olde Scribe Fly On the Wall Productions Somewhat Proudly Presents…

Interesting, But Rejected, Campaign Slogans

Scribe’s cloned flies on the wall have been busy bouncing from campaign to campaign to collect these. John McCain seems to have a fly fetish so his headquarters has had to have an extra dose of clone infestation. They’ve been cloned so many times their getting almost as dull as John. Here is what they reported back as slogans and jokes for speeches that have been considered, but rejected…

Slogans

Hillary…

“Vote for the babe with less tact and a whole lot more, “Ack! Ack!”

Barack…

“Our nation: out of the red, into the Black.”

McCain…

“Bringing the Hanoi Hilton experience out of Iraq and into America.”

Hillary…

“Look, if you were a tyrant or a terrorist… wouldn’t you rather just give up than have to listen to HER when she gets all pissed off?”

O’Bama…

“No, he won’t sing Camptown Races or ask ‘where da white women at,’ no matter how funny you think that ‘joke’ is.”

McCain…

“Even gnomes might vote for the old fossil who drones.”

Hillary…

“Because she has a dream… bullets flew over her head.”

Barack…

“Because we really want another guy who may have less experience, but says he will surround himself with ‘good’ advisers, right?”

McCain…

“God is on his side… (…but sleeping through everything he says, can’t you see the do not disturb sign?)”

Barack

“Vote O’Bama or America be Damned!”

Hillary

“Because the nutjob Righties wouldn’t do that to the other Clinton, would they? Would they?”

McCain

“Because life too short to miss Armageddon.”

Hillary

“What, you expected some Monica based slogan or something?”

Barack

“Come on America, ain’t ya tired of all white meat YET?”

Rejected Jokes for Nomination Speech

Hillary

“Three candidates for president walked into a bar: two with experience and and an African American…”

Barack

“Three candidates for President walk into a bar: one wanting to mend the nation, another seeking victory in Iraq and a blond.”

McCain

“Three candidates… I said, ‘Three candidates….’ hello, hello, is this thing on? Stop that snoring!!!!!!!!!!”

Campaign Songs

Hillary

“I am woman, hear me roar…”

Barack

Born in the U.S.A.

McCain

99 years of war on the wall, 99 years of war. Take the calendar down, pass the next one around, 99 years of war on the wall (The song that never ends. But it will at least get rid of those obnoxious youngsters turned soldier who make McCain jealous and seem even more ancient.)