Donald Trump, as well as other Republicans, have often been accused of projection in recent years. That is the act of accusing others of what they are themselves guilty of (and believing it, according to the psychological definition of the term).
If that’s true – and I think it is – I believe we have evidence that Donald Trump engages in self-loathing. Actually, this is not surprising to me, as narcissists often have been noted, ironically, to despise themselves, and be covering up for massive insecurities by putting on an act of bravado. This may not be true of all narcissists, which refers to unhealthy, egotistical “self-loving,” but I think it is true of many of them, Donald Trump included.
In a recent interview with conservative host Ross Douthat on 60 Minutes, Trump admitted that he could not forgive his “enemies,” even if that meant that he could not “get into heaven.” He went on to describe his “enemies” thusly: “extremely dishonest people, very bad people, very bad for our country. I love our country far more than I can love people and people like that.”
It seems to me that Trump is describing himself here, as extremely dishonest and bad for our country. Furthermore, when he says that he loves our country, he is referring to himself, which is a contradiction, but this is the kind of contradiction that narcissism creates, between inner self-hatred and outward displays of self-love which are meant to hide the self-hatred.
There is a huge difference between genuine self-regard, as championed by humanistic psychology, and the egotistical displays of overconfidence and self-promotion that the likes of Donald J. Trump display. Genuine self-regard is not boastful. It is more like quiet self-assurance and confidence in one’s own good intentions. It is based on actual, realistic feedback and assessments of how one behaves in life’s various situations. It is earned self-respect. A narcissist pretends to be the best at everything, without having earned anything. To the extent that a narcissist realizes that it’s an act, the narcissist may actually feel self-loathing.
That’s the big question: Does Trump even realize how narcissistic and ridiculous he is being? To the extent that Trump lives in fantasy world of his own making, he may believe his own grandiose proclamations. He is clearly delusional, but I have to suspect that some self-doubt must creep into his psyche. Trump can’t avoid the world’s disapproval of him forever, as the recent midterm elections show. He will try to spin it and explain it away as not being his fault, but he knows that his party lost bigly.
As a deeply narcissistic person, I doubt that he is even capable of feeling true love. However, his hatred is real. This is the trap that a narcissist such as Trump finds himself in. As some have postulated, the opposite of love is not hate, but indifference. Trump is not indifferent to anything that catches his attention. Rather, he seems incapable of indifference as well as love, feeling compelled to react strongly to everything around him.
And that, only leaves him with hate, starting with his hatred of himself as the ultimate disingenuous person.
This is dangerous when Trump lashes out with hatred at the world, as he has often done. We must be prepared for an escalation of that as his political fortunes fade and he descends into a state of narcissistic collapse.
The good news in this, is that Trump will likely reserve his greatest ire for his former allies in the Republican Party – those formerly closest to him, as fitting for a person filled with self-hatred.