Fri. Mar 1st, 2024

by Ken Carman
Never thought I’d type that title.


Listening to Mike Huckabee being interviewed by Alex Bennett, amidst the usual right blather, I was struck by one comment that actually made sense. I’ll get there in a moment, but let me cover a few of the more nonsensical things he said.

Alex brought up the “socialism” mantra and Huckabee immediate stated that if the government takes money and then forces me to be charitable that’s wrong. OK, then let’s not have tax cuts for the rich, let’s have taxes for churches like everyone else and no breaks or special “offers:” especially eminent domain, for corporations. No rules that allow big corporations to lord over small.

The list is endless. It’s corporate socialism, and in a sense national socialism because our pols our pandering to entities who, according to the Supremes, can turn around and stuff money back in their pockets.

My guess is, however, Mike might supports most of those corporate/government forms of mutual financial ass kissing, if not all. “Charity” is in the mind of the policy, law, regulation and corporate cash holders, I suppose.

Huckabee came down heavy on Barack for the economy and Alex brought up Bush. Then Mike launched into this canard extremists always use to defend the indefensible: make up absurd accusations; like “then let’s blame Bush for aliens with cattle probes too…” in attempt to make pointing out Bush’s complicity seem silly.

Let’s try this…

“Yeah, Hitler may have acted badly towards the Jews, but then, while we’re at it, let’s blame Hitler for forest fires in Arizona, the extinction of the dinosaurs, the ice age…”

Yup, it’s a stupid way to argue, but stupid will work for idiots who suck up such argumentative, philosophical, swill. Then Huck lied: claiming Barack has trashed the economy far more than Bush ever did in a mere 3 years. Well, if you ignore all the off budget war making you might get close, and you don’t add in the sucked down give away toilet tax giveaways, or the pallets of money flown to bribe those in Iraq who most likely took it and kept killing anyway… you might get close to his claim.

But philosophically? That would be lying with a huge capital…


Yet one thing he did say I agreed with was he’s tired of poke em’ in the eye politics. Go ahead, heap on the hypocrite claims. I admit: I’m no saint. However Mike: an intelligent man by all counts, absolutely has to know he was being evasive with all the sarcasm and then ignoring why his talking points were pure pure rancid bull excrement.

But we do live in a Stooge-ish time. Pointing out some specific Dem moral problems gets a Newty divorce her on her death bed poke back. Comedian wannabes provide the “nuke, nuke, nuke” that simply explodes all over the slightest chance of having a rational, serious, discussion. Moe grabs Larry Craig’s ear and points out his “nasty, nasty,” after Larry took his turn with Bill Clinton. Meanwhile those with dead interns in their (Ft. Walton Beach) headquarters are allowed to quickly sneak away from possibility actual real investigations, and actually become part of the media nyuk nuyk crowd, as long as they do so… quietly.

Apparently if you go away quietly, quickly, you too are welcome to join the merriment when you have one network dedicated to being the propaganda organ for your political machine.

O.J. Simpson may have nothing on Joe Scarbourgh, but legally we may never really know. Best to use it all, and feed it into this one, huge, Stooge act that resembles what might happen to you if tossed into a wood chipper.

If Joey’s name had been Senator Barack Obama you know those soon to become Birthers alone would have demanded “justice,” or a finding of guilt by accusation. Fire up the wood chipper!

I tend to wonder what would happen if Nixon’s Watergate moments came down today. Would he replace Bill O’Reilly? Would his side simply counter with some headline snatching accusation aimed at the other team?

Littered throughout this edition of Inspection are examples of me doing some eye poking, I admit. But the question must be asked: if you know you’re going to keep getting your eye poked no matter what, do you just sit back and get poked without countering? Anyone who thinks sympathy will auto follow these days, instead of “do it again!” and nyuk, nyuks, is either a fool, or trying to get you just submit to more poking.

The question is, of course, when does it end.

Like trying to reach the horizon: you never will, and I doubt it ever will end either: to the delight of what these days is laughingly called, “the news media.”

I tired of this dynamic long ago, and to be honest it didn’t just start with Clinton. But there was a time when the Buckley brothers would agree it was time for Nixon to go, or leftists would agree with the right that it was time for LBJ not to run again, or Carter had become problematic. Frankly I think the current round of eye poke politics started with vague accusations of possible communist connections in the 50s, or yellow journalism long before that. When the owners of major news media figure out that while murdering real news and objective journalism has the potential to bring in boatloads of profits, their “reports” start resembling the front page of The Star, or Soap Opera Digest. We just haven’t quite gotten to the space alien gave birth to Obama’s baby yet, though Birther claims came close. But, to butcher the title of a Bob Dylan song: those times they are a comin.

I just can’t wait, can you?

It’s a poke eye out, rabid dog chase dog’s own tail, political world out there these days…

And we are far worse off as a nation for it.


Inspection is a column that has been written by Ken Carman for over 30 years. Inspection is dedicated to looking at odd angles, under all the rocks and into the unseen cracks and crevasses that constitute the issues and philosophical constructs of our day: places few think, or even dare, to venture.

©Copyright 2011
Ken Carman and Cartenual Productions
All Rights Reserved

By Ken Carman

Retired entertainer, provider of educational services, columnist, homebrewer, collie lover, writer of songs, poetry and prose... humorist, mediocre motorcyclist, very bad carpenter, horrid handyman and quirky eccentric deluxe.

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